sight isn’t always necessary

And Another One…

Try and figure this out. I found it in a binder of mine, I think in my Model UN folder. It’s kinda funny. Kinda interesting, if you were me you’d know why. It’s good though! If you’re not aware of who the people are, you can almost picture them!

So I’m sitting here in clas, only myself and three other people in the room, and the door behind me opens. I get a deep chill in the base of my spine as the heavy door screeches and squeals open, and then the sound of very loud shoes hitting the cement floor fills the room. I look up quickly, only to meet her eyes for but a moment. She rolls the eyes, dark brown and angry looking, back in her eye sockets, as if they were actually hurt by meeting mine. I suddenly feel as if I were sitting in her declared “spot” in this empty classroom of empty seats. Somehow, the exact seat that she had woke up this morning WANTING to sit in, I had chosen. She passes me with a deep sigh and falls into the chair in front of me. A couple more desperate sighs escape, and she finally shifts her seat to face the professor more directly. I hate it when people have attitudes that are so strong you can feel the thickness of emotions in the air around them. I can hardly breathe with her in front of me, and little did I know that this is only the beginning of her “show”.

She set out on life with some terrible news

That the dreams she had dreamt were a lie

And she took that with her to the end of the road

Where she had to sob her good-byes.

Into a world of cynical people

She walked among them in a daze

Knowing that this was not the life for her

In her eyes you could sense growing craze.

She realized her mind was stronger than that

The first day she stood on her feet

An end was near, and her future was clear

This was not a mistake she’d repeat.

So the gates slowly opened and she stood by the bars

That had kept her at bay from the world

Unleashed, she stepped forth

Took one glance behind

Finally her dreams were unfurled.

Craig invited me out to lunch today. We had a big fight last night and I think he’s trying to make up. I’m excited. It’s rare for him to take time off from work to see me. I hope he’s in a good mood.

I want to have middle eastern food for dinner tonight, but I’m not sure of any of the spices that they use in their cooking. I have to look it up. If anyone has any ideas for a good website to look for middle eastern recipes, let me know. I really want to know what they marinate chicken in to make it taste so good. Thanks!

weather.com – Local Weather Page

So… today I had to work. Craig and I are thinking about moving back up to Detroit. There are a lot of conflicting emotions going on in my head right now. One of them is that this choice was not my own, and I have a problem with that. It seems that throughout all of my life, everything I ever did was a choice that I made. Even when I was a child, I was defiant. It’s very strange to let another person, namely Craig, make decisions for me. Craig has been so passive for this whole time – through all of my dreaming, he has just gone along with me. He pretends like he’s listening, and when I’m done dreaming, he stops pretending. So we were going to move to Canada, Florida, Spain, North Carolina, or Savannah, Georgia. And all of those places sound great to me – but I think that I’m dreaming about being there alone without Craig. The only place I can think of where Craig and I would both be happy is Detroit. And that sucks. I do not want to be around Craig’s parents 24/7. They make me crazy. Even today, they were convincing Craig that he was doing something wrong by coming home to see me. And he actually thought twice about it. Lied to them. Made up an excuse. The other day when I told him that I was suddenly considering Detroit, he didn’t even hesitate. He thinks it’s a great idea – let’s do it. UGH. I can’t even think about the hassle it will be to live near Neil and Ann. Yuck. They really get on my nerves sometimes, and it’s a big gamble to be putting this on a website. They probably won’t ever even be able to find it. It’s kinda fun! That is my biggest problem with moving to Detroit. I hate secrets, and it seems like every moment around them is a secret. They don’t allow a person to feel free with their thoughts. I hate it that I have to feel bad for smoking a cigarette around them. My mom and dad wish I didn’t smoke, but won’t say a word about it, because they allow me to be my own person. Since the beginning, Craig’s parents have had control of the situation. Maybe being closer to them will make them back off. I just hope that Craig actually does what I want him to do, and tells them that we need privacy, and an invitation is needed for them to visit us. They cannot look for apartments for us, or for a house. They can’t even THINK about pestering me about kids. If I have kids when we’re in Michigan, it will not be for a long time – at least until I have my master’s degree, and Craig is in med school. And then after I have kids, they can’t come over to see my child until I feel comfortable – at least a week. Craig can take that kid to see them – but I need space. I need YEARS of space from them. It’s sad, but the thought of them makes my blood boil. Ugh. Think happy thoughts Liz! ARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!

Later.